DIVORCE is a loss of what could have been, and what was suppose to be.
Exchanging heart felt vows on your wedding day was genuine and loving. It set the stage for connection and a life-time with our best friend and lover.
The decision to marry carries many wants and needs and excitement toward the future. The fact is, decisions are made based on the information we have at the time. The fact then was
“I’m ready to take this next step and commit to marriage” Making the marriage and union legally binding. The institution of marriage is a legal contract.
What occurs later in the marriage, say in a year or ten years is everyone’s surprise.
The marital law holds the marriage in a contract. We take the vows, sign the license and the deal is
legal. You have entered into the laws of marriage.
Divorce is breaking this contract. What and who starts the process for divorce is usually the one
who can no longer tolerate the incompatibility, the constant tension, the conflict and recognizes that the once upon a time, happy existence has eroded to contempt and loathing. Divorce is the remedy and the resolve to an unhappy marriage. Marital Law clearly defines how a marriage needs to be dissolved. There are calculations, assets liabilities, parenting plans, and many other factors that take a marital financial institution to its final end. Once divorce or separation is established, financial responsibility is based on the agreement both parties share.
In Mediation this agreement is created together with certified mediators and divorce coaches that sift through the finances and the emotional loss. Remember, decisions are made based on the information that is available and known at the time. THIS is when knowledge is power, and the
most important decisions are your finances for the present and future, and your emotional well-being for healing and moving on. The law does not always know what the best decision for you is, the law knows what the law is. Mediators and divorce coaches take the initiative to get to know the client’s needs. If a couple chooses mediation they are not looking to hurt their spouse but instead get through the process and settle on an equitable agreement. Together everyone creates the best plan for all and keeps in mind what is in the best interest of the children. This usually requires, maturity, integrity, honesty and parent priority. It is not necessary nor productive to hate your spouse.
Hating, fighting and frustration through the court system takes a toll on everyone, it breeds unnecessary stress which is unhealthy and destructive. Mediators know the law
they understand the calculations and all the financials of property, retirement, support, equitable distribution of assets and liabilities. There is no better decision for
an amicable separation, that spares the blood-shed and enormous expense that litigation causes. MEDIATE don’t LITIGATE
Source: Mediation and Counseling Blog